By David Monforton

“Are we there yet?”
“I hafta go to the bafroom.”
“He’s looking at me!”
“She has her hand on my side of the seat!”
“Oops! Uh oh…”

As a parent of three small children, I’ve heard these phrases—and many more—time and again while driving my children somewhere in the car. Most parents can relate to the stress of not only paying attention to the constantly changing conditions and situations on the road, but also of being tuned in to the constantly changing conditions and situations in the backseat. And for a long drive on a family vacation, that stress can be magnified a hundredfold.

But there is hope.

With a little organization and preplanning, even the most active children can be kept occupied on these long trips, making for a far more enjoyable vacation for everyone in the car. Games, food and physical activity can all be controlled, structured in such a way that your children will compare their time in the car to playing in the backyard, instead of a visit to the doctor’s office for vaccinations.

Busy Busy Busy
Keep the kids involved. Hand-held electronic games can keep a child busy for long stretches, but they can be relatively expensive and few challenge the imagination or intellect. As an alternative, share the driving experience with them (and I don’t mean putting them behind the wheel for a few miles). Play games that force them to look at the other vehicles and signs on the road.

An all-time favorite is to see who can recognize the different state license plates in a set time period. When I was a child, each state had just a single design for its plates, so the game could get boring quickly. Today, though, each state offers a multitude of designs and colors, opening the door for children’s cross-country discoveries.

For the younger ones, count the various colors of cars, or count cars versus trucks versus buses. (“Look! A school bus! What color is that?”)

Give the kids a sense of ownership on the trip. If they’re up to it, let them help plan the route, including destinations and how to get there. In the car, give them a map or a list of cities along the way. As you pass each one, have them mark it off their list.

When these counting games start to get old, give them a toy to play with. But rather than giving them a bag of toys at the beginning of the trip, buy a handful at the dollar store, individually wrap them (what kid doesn’t love to open a present), and pass them out at set intervals, letting them know that at such and such time or when you reach the next city, you will give them the next toy. Oh, and make sure you have enough to pass out on the return trip home, as well. You and your children can bask in the opening of the final toy of the trip. (“One hour until we’re home!”)

Like the counting game, choose toys that will challenge your child’s intelligence and creativity. Avoid puzzles or games with small pieces, because you know that two minutes after you pass it back, something will fall from your child’s small hand to the floor or under the seat.

Kids love to sing, so find out what songs they sing in school and make it a group sing-a-long—no exceptions, Mom and Dad. Plus, introduce them to songs you sang when you were their age, taking time to tell them what cars and vacations were like back in the Dark Ages. Put in a tape or CD of children’s songs and watch the time zip by.

Give ’em a Break
No matter how much fun your kids are having in the backseat, they require frequent opportunities to run around and expel some of that natural pent-up energy. Stop at a rest area at least once every two hours and let the kids run around for 10 minutes. As a bonus, that activity followed by sitting again in the car may inspire them to take a nap. Hooray! If they do nap, make sure to wake them up at least five minutes before you reach your next destination. This allows them to wake up gradually and get their bearings. And give them a small pillow to rest their head against.

While you and I may be able to hold out and eat every five or six hours, kids seem to get hungry just minutes after a meal. Pack food for them, but do it wisely. Instead of handing them a large bag of chips that they can eat as much of as they want—messy and unhealthy—put together snack-size bags of healthy treats ahead of time.

You may be tempted to give them juice boxes—and hydration is very important—but my kids still have a habit of squeezing the darn things, creating a spectacular fountain effect as the juice arcs through the air and onto their shirts, their siblings and anything else within a three-foot radius. Instead, use small water bottles with pop up caps. This way, even if there is spillage, the water will dry up and leave no mark.

Keep a Clean Machine
Keeping your car clean with young passengers can seem like pie in the sky. But doing the following can get you home with a backseat that looks more like when it was on the dealer lot than your having just driven 2,000 miles with three young children.

Cover their seats with towels. Towels are soft to sit on and easy to clean if there are any spills or accidents.

Bring along a supply of wet naps or baby wipes. They’re inexpensive, smell great, and work wonders, especially on fresh spills and stains.

Put a litterbag or plastic grocery bag on each door or window handle for trash. What is it with the fascination kids have with throwing away garbage? Give them a place to dispose of their rubbish, and they suddenly become neat freaks.

ID Your Child
For safety’s sake, you should always have some sort of identification on small children, especially if they don’t know their address or phone number by heart. While having your child’s name visible on his or her clothing is very dangerous, a piece of paper in the child’s pocket is enough to let authorities know how to reach you, should the unthinkable occur and you and your child are separated.

A road trip with the family can be one of the most memorable events in your life. With a little thought and effort, you can make those memories fond and happy, of family togetherness and the joy of the road.

Follow some or all of these suggestions on your next family vacation, and maybe you’ll hear these phrases instead:

(Whispered between two normally bitter-rival siblings) “Let’s play it again.”

“I’m tired. Can I sleep now?”

“You mean we’re there already?!”

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